Point and pat

I don't think it's any secret that my boss is a goofball.  I may or may not have pointed out that his picture is in the dictionary next to "buffoon", but the truth is he's somewhere between pretty tolerable and a nincompoop.  He definitely doesn't micromanage me which is a huge plus.  I do my best work when I figure out things myself and am free to improve my processes.  He also puts up with more crap from me than he probably should.  Can't help myself on that one.

But honestly he's dumb as a post sometimes (his picture is also in the dictionary next to "post: dumb as") and it's been a dumb and dumber couple of weeks.  I've had to manage things in the office and solve problems in a round about way so he thinks he's managing and solving.  It gets things done, gets things solved, and makes him feel accomplished even though I get no credit or management compensation.

One of my peeves is his inability to commit to a concrete request while at the same time he's quick to praise himself when he does.  Case in point is when I told him that since I'm working at the New Student Orientations (our Admissions and Financial Aid offices requested my help because he's too much of a challenge to work with) I would need for him to run the accounting processes at the end of the work day.  His response:  "I think maybe we could do that."  I've learned from experience that a statement like that from him isn't worth the oxygen he inhaled because a) he's not really agreeing it needs to be done, b) if he does agree, he's not really saying he'll do it, and c) he's not really sure what he's not agreeing to do.

Since I'm on to him, I said, "I'm going to be away from my desk all afternoon, so I won't be able to monitor the refunds or clear up any problems before running the processes."

"Well sure, I can probably do them."

"So you'll do it then?"

"I'll do them."

On the first afternoon I was out of the office, I was away until the final half hour of the work day.  When I returned, he said, "So....did you want me to run the processes?"

An on it went.  He continued to ask me each time and each time I told him yes and that I had been away all afternoon and my desk was piled up.  About a week ago he was walking to a meeting with me and he pointed out that he was happy to run the processes on those days when I was away at the NSO because it was only fair.  Magnanimous.  I knew he was looking for some strokes so I told him thanks, and that it was indeed very helpful.  On Tuesday I was out at an NSO until 4:30 and when I arrived back at the office he said, "I'm assuming you want me to run the processes?" which is just another ploy to see if he can get out of doing the one thing he said he would do after he had patted himself on the back about doing it while fishing for a compliment for doing it.

AARRRGH!

I have little patience with a grown man who works so hard seeking approval but spends so little energy earning it.   To make it worse, when he is confronted with something he did wrong or didn't do at all, he is the first to point the finger at someone else.  We in the office like to say he points the finger while patting himself on the back.  We even have a gesture to demonstrate how he manages that particular bit of gymnastics.

We have a lot of gestures, but that's another post.