Trials

I don't remember a time when so many people I know or parents of people I know have passed away in such a short period.  My brother's wife succumbed to cancer about two weeks ago.  A friend's father a couple of days after that.  Another friend's mother that same week.  A co-worker, and then another friend's mother the next week.  All of the deaths were expected, but I feel as if I sit at the confluence of rivers of tears.

My sister-in-law fought the good fight.  Her stoicism was an inspiration and a lesson I hope never to employ.  She was a few days shy of 65, the co-worker was a bit older, but the rest of the deaths were for people in their 80's and 90's who had been ill for some time.  One woman had Alzheimer's and has been failing for a few years.  Her system was strong even though her mind had retreated into confusion and paranoia.

On the flip side (and isn't there always a flip side?) we celebrate the first birthday of our grandson this week.  His party was Saturday and he waded in to the occasion with no hesitation.  He no longer needs to wear his helmet and he's cruising around furniture, making some attempts to stand on his own.  He is a blessing to us all and an homage to living in a time and place where medical solutions do exist.

R is working to wrap up his business and find a job where he is an employee, not the boss.  It's hard on him and he alternates between feeling good about the future and worrying in advance.  We both think it will feel better when it's over, but 36 years of doing the same thing doesn't train a person for change.  I don't think I'm deceiving myself, but I feel strongly that everything will work out.

And my little worry is I'm in the midst of craziness at work for at least another couple of weeks.  It pales in comparison to what others around me are going through, but it's affecting my sleep and causing me to ache.  I took a pain pill a while ago that I hope will let my shoulder, elbow, and wrist have a pain-free night.

So that's it.  I took a warm bath tonight and am looking forward to bed (drowsiness is a side effect).  When I'm not so sleepy, I'll write about the trust fall I did at my leadership class orientation from a platform about as tall as me.  Super scared, but really cool.