Fool

I am a fool. I am an idiot as well. And stupid.

But more about that in a minute. We heard back on our bid and it was a big negatory. She didn't even want to counter offer which was pretty dumb in this housing market but like I said before, I'm pretty sure she didn't want to sell. I think circumstances are forcing her to do things she isn't ready to do. It's really fine and I'm just happy I got my closet painted. Every closet has a silver lining...

Now the stupid part. Remember how I've been helping out at my old job, training my replacement? All while working full time? All during my free time on evenings and weekends? Well, before I left the job I told my boss that I had no intention of having two jobs and that this was just temporary, and he agreed. Last week I told him that I would make one more trip into the office and then I'd turn in my key, and the rest would have to be covered via e-mail or online. I scheduled time to meet with the replacement on Saturday morning because we still had a lot to cover.

And remember how when I left he told me he would pay me my normal wage per hour while I was working after hours? I didn't like that because it is way less than I make when I do contract or consulting work, but I didn't have a good response for it at the time. Truthfully I was taken aback at his lack of awareness. I should have said something like, "Well, you do understand that I would no longer be an employee but would be considered contract labor so I will need to adjust what I get an hour to what is more in line with what I typically charge for that," but I was just ready to be done with as little hassle as possible so I agreed.

I've been chastised by several people who have told me I'm crazy to help out at a job I hated, for wages that are less than I should get, for an indefinite period of time, for people who don't appreciate it. I finally grew a pair last week and let him know (via e-mail -- still kind of chicken) that effective October 1 I would be switching to my contract labor rates per hour. I told him that I felt by that time most of the work would be completed so I would be available to answer questions and solve problems on a smaller scale. When I went in on Saturday, I spoke with my replacement and she said he was not happy about that. I was floored and really hurt because I have been bending over backwards, working to the point of exhaustion, to help people who have taken advantage of my good nature and are now badmouthing me for requesting an hourly rate for duties performed evenings and weekends that is a fraction of what he charges for work performed during daylight hours.

And to make it even worse, I ended up working TEN hours on Saturday (5 at the office, 5 from home), skipping supper, all to unravel a mess that my replacement made. And this will all be billed at my old wage rate. Not even overtime. Plus another hour this morning to wrap it up.

A bigger fool there never was.

So after sleeping badly last night, I needed a nap this afternoon but then we went shopping and I bought a few more new clothes to wear to the new job. It's like I'm shedding the old skin because I barely want to wear my old stuff any longer. Of course it was mostly suits and dresses so there's no way I'm putting that stuff on again anyway.

I do know this about myself. I may be a fool and I may have been taken advantage of, but I'm more comfortable with that than being a jerk.